Today is the last day of the year and my pain has been crippling me. I’ve spent most of the day in bed just not quite feeling like myself until I finally built up enough energy to take a shower. I realized then that it was you.
This trip to Ohio has been great fun and filled with lots to do. Somehow, your absence missed me all week but hit me today like a ton of bricks. Grandpa Bill had to put Lady to sleep. You never knew her but she was quite old. Your Papa forgot to tell me months ago and I was stricken with sadness as Grandpa Bill recounted the story then spared us his feelings since he knew we recently went through the same thing with you…sort of.
We had a surprise baby shower for your Aunt Sophia and everyone there mentioned how sorry they were to hear about your passing. This has been our first trip back to Ohio since you’re gone. They all loved you and knew how much you meant to me and Papa.
Setting up for the shower at your Aunt Fran’s cabin, I was always greeted by a happy Ariel. Papa and I were excited for you two to see each other again since you got along so surprisingly well the last time we came for a visit. She’s a good dog like you were. Just slightly misunderstood.
Tonight we’ll head back to the cabin for a New Year’s Eve party. Lots of people will be there. I’m hoping no one mentions you. I had to skip out on a visit to see some of Papa’s young cousins today b/c their Mama told me last night just how upset they had been when they heard about you 2 months ago. Two months ago yesterday.
I couldn’t get out of bed today. I cannot stop crying.
I miss you. I think I’m fine, laughing with Papa about something silly you did once but then it will sneak up on me when I least expect it. That’s what’s happening today.
I miss you.